Saturday, October 20, 2012

The Fear of Changing a Door Knob

A heavy fall rain  is falling at this time here at the Inn. It is really coming down  and once again the  fire crackling in my wood stove feels great. I have to go out for supper as  my sister just got home and a delicious plate of lasanga is waiting for me, so it will be worth going out in this wet weather.  It was a busy day here, as Saturdays always are, for it is catch up on chores day. I amazed myself by changing the lock on my front door all by myself. I knew it had to be done and have thought about it for about two months, wondering who I could get to come in and change it. Part of me said to do it myself, the  other part said  you can't do that Mary... it takes someone who knows what they are doing.  That persistant voice that is always trying to hold me back told me that I would get into a mess if I tried and then what would I do. It would be worst than ever, because I would  ruin the lock already there and then my door would not lock at all.  So I listened to  that supposedly voice of reason but this morning I said no and looked on Google to see if I could maybe try and actually do it. I found my screw driver,  opened the package for the new knob and after about twenty minutes, I had  the new knob in place and the key actually opened it.

VOILA... I did it!!!  It felt great and it made me realize how fear  has been a part of my life and how many times it has stopped me.  Maybe I can do so much more... maybe I can be so much more... I just have to try. Maybe I can surprise myself with so many other things that I have wanted to do, if I can just silence that voice inside of me.

You know the old saying that there is nothing to fear but fear itself.... well maybe it is true!!!!

 The next installement on Annie Wright is almost ready and I will post it tomorrow
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